Simple Sunday: Our teddy-bear God and the truths of forgiveness

“For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” Matthew 6:13-15

God, refusing to forgive?

What happened to the God who forgives everyone, for everything, all the time?

Are we misinterpreting the scripture? Or is this just the teddy-bear God we’ve grown accustomed to?

The issue I’ve always had with these verses is my preconceived notion that God, who is all-loving, and Jesus, whose death purchased unlimited, unmerited forgiveness, should forgive in all circumstances. I mean, that’s what I was taught in Sunday School growing up. That’s what most people assume about Christianity. 

But I think a lot of people - Christians included - share in the tension here; we wonder, how could God be identified as Love itself while at the same time do something like refuse to forgive (which we perceive as pompous, even judgmental)? In actuality, however, the withholding of his grace is one of the most loving things he could do for us.

See, He puts that ultimatum there - that we must forgive others to be forgiven - because if we accepted God’s forgiveness without forgiving others, we wouldn’t fully understand or receive God’s forgiveness ourselves. God wants to give us the full measure of his grace, He wants us to have forgiveness in its entirety, because with the deepest love Jesus paid for it all on the cross. And the very nature of his forgiveness is to change hearts. True forgiveness alters our hearts in such a way that we want to offer that same forgiveness to others; we are meant to give what we have received. If we accept forgiveness for ourselves but our hearts are not changed for the forgiveness of others, we have thwarted forgiveness. Misunderstood it. Cheapened it.

There is supposed to be tension here, in these verses...so if this concept of God’s forgiveness being withheld still bothers you, that’s okay. I’d encourage you to wrestle with it today. And I’d challenge you to confront the areas you need to forgive so that you can truly embrace forgiveness, because Him withholding grace here is actually one of the most graceful things he does for us. While we'll never perfectly understand God or his forgiveness, there is such beauty and such comfort we can take in the fact that He promises that He is orchestrating everything together for the ultimate good of His people (Romans 8:28), and friends, God never relents on his promises.

written by Taylor Fohr