This blog post is a departure from my normal apologetics posts. The reason is because I’ve been very contemplative lately. I’m less than 3 months away from 30 but I’ve only recently begun to feel more like an “adult” in these times. The more I ponder these things the more I wonder what I would say to me 10 years ago. I’m not expecting this to be earth shattering or anything like that, and chances are I wouldn’t have listened to me even if I could somehow break the laws of physics and travel through space and time to talk to me. But I keep thinking about more and more about what I would say.
I work with college and young adult students at my church and I continue to see myself in so many of them. I had my time of waywardness, times of questioning, times of wondering if I was really seeking “God’s plan for my life”. So this is a letter to myself, but it’s also a letter to all of the college students and young adults who are trying to figure out life.
Dear past Brian,
Through a twist and tear in the fabric of space and time, a letter from future you has been sent to you in an attempt to give you advice. I know the last thing you want right now is more advice because it seems like everyone is trying to do that. But this isn’t some trite answer. The advice here isn’t some quick fix to make life better. There are no quick fixes, there is only hard work. So here is a little bit of advice to help with that:
First, grow up. No seriously, grow up. I don’t mean that in the “stop acting like a child” sardonic sense. I mean embrace adulthood. Our generation, the Millennials, are guilty of delaying adulthood for as long as we can. 30 has become the new 20 and many people are waiting longer than ever to grow up. Some of this is our fault and some of it is the product of our environment. http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2012/02/09/young-underemployed-and-optimistic/1/ Either way, the sooner you can grow up, the better. Because being an adult isn’t about knowing what to do in every single situation, it’s about having the confidence to make hard decisions and to see them through.
Second, don’t compare yourself to others. This probably ranks up there with some of the most valuable information that could be given. If you want to drive yourself mad, compare yourself to other people. Not all people from our generation delayed adulthood; equally likely, not all people from our generation are entrepreneurs. It is wasteful to spend time comparing yourself to someone else. They are not you and you are not them. Each of you has different strengths and giftings and the trick is figuring out how to use them to your advantage. Your life is not a failure because you didn’t have the simple idea that spawned a multi-million dollar company. That is a rare feat and should not be considered the norm.
Third, don’t panic. Finals are a stressful time, so is hoping you’ll have enough in your bank account to pay all of your bills. But life is an ebb and flow of good times and bad times. There are many seasons to life and there will be times when things are just not going our way. “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.” (Ecclesiastes 3:1) When you panic, you lose sight of all the other things that are going right in your life and in your world. It’s easy to get stressed, trust me I’ve been there and I’ve done that so I know. Remember the advice Dad gave to us: “Life is like a roller coaster with ups and downs and you job is to make the ride seem as smooth as possible.” Life doesn’t necessarily get easier when you get older, but you get better about being level headed in all situations.
Fourth, stop looking for the elusive “God’s plan for your life”. Seriously, stop looking right now. God does not have some secret, hidden will that can only be found by using your magic decoder ring from your cereal box. Finding some secret plan is not biblical. The only will for your life that God has for you is this: “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 That’s it right there, plain and simple. God desires that you live your life to please Him and you do that praising Him and giving thanks in all circumstances. Understand, it is important to pray and to seek His wisdom before making decisions, but you shouldn’t let fear keep you from living life. Pray, seek God’s voice, then make your decision and trust that God will see you on the other side of that decision. For more information on this, Kevin DeYoung has an excellent short book called, “Just Do Something” in which he addresses this issue and it worth the read. http://www.amazon.com/Just-Do-Something-Liberating-Approach/dp/0802458386
Lastly, fifth, remember to have fun. Find things that you enjoy doing and do them. Learn a new skill, learn to play a new instrument, read more, explore the world around you, hang out with friends, try new restaurants and coffee shops, and take chances because you never know what will happen. Life is difficult but that doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be fun. Your friends and your family love you and they will be there for you. God loves you and He has promised to never leave nor forsake you. Remember that. No matter how bad life gets, tomorrow is a new morning with a new sunrise and new mercies from God to live your life.
That’s it for now, past me. I will see you … in about 10 years. And one last thing, when you get to… nah, I’m not going to tell you, it will be way more fun for you to just experience.
Blessings,
Brian Ceely (from the future)
Yeah, spot-on...
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